AmusedOur office is slowly becoming a kitten rescue project. I’ve seen quite a few of them pass through our “No Pets Allowed” interior of late. People are apparently dumping their kittens at me place of employment in hopes that some employee on their way to lunch or home will see them mewling pitifully and be overwhelmed by their cuteness and take at least one of the previously unwanted critters home.
So far, the plan seems to be working. Last year, Shadow came through the office, creating pandemonium in his wake. Here’s the story of the havoc he wreaked, as told in an entry on my old journal:
Today at work , during lunch one of our new agents found this little long-haired gray kitten on the side of the road and brought it back. the thing was so cute and pitiful and couldn't have been more than 2 months old, but it's a business so pets are not allowed in any sense of the word. So, we spent all day hiding a 2-month old cat from management until one of us clocked out and could take it home. My cubicle wound up being converted into a playpen, but the critter refused to be contained. It was completely hyperactive and ready to explore, so it kept jumping over all the barricades we made. We had to chase it all over our row of cubes.
All was going well until our manager went home. That's when we almost got busted. One of the more strict managers came over to talk to me while I was babysitting our kitty. He knew I'm going to new york and was recommending places to see while I was there. I had to shove this cat in my filing cabinet and kick the door shut before he saw it, or we were all in serious shit. The whole time we were talking, I was sitting on my desk hoping I didn't look too flustered, and had one foot on the drawer to keep the kitten from opening it and was just praying it wouldn't start scratching or crying. Thankfully, she seemed to realize we were in dire crisis mode and kept quiet.
Only problem was, the barricades were still up around my cube and he was naturally curious as to what the hell we were doing. I had to make up some bs story and be all cute and flirty, saying I was stressed out and had resigned from the team and was living in my playpen of happiness until further notice. He laughed, and I managed to lead him off our row and pass word for someone to liberate the kitty before something happened.
One of my teammates too her home at the end of the day, when we clocked out. So, hopefully, she'll live happily ever after.
Shadow turned out to be a he, and he is still doing will living with Andi, her husband and a Great Dane, among others.
Today, at around 1:30 in the morning, Joy, one of our new agents I just finished mentoring, goes shooting past my cubicle saying something about having to see the kittens. I’m thinking, wait, we have more kittens in the building, and naturally took off, as I love cute kittens and wanted to find out what the heck she was talking about. We would up running around half the building taking the long way (and yes, there is a long way and a much shorter, short way to do it) until we happened upon a cubicle in the back with one of the night-shifters and a duo of tiny little kittens, a blackish-brown one and a calico striped. Her manager was holed up in her office across the way, sneezing her head off from a combination of cat allergies and that God-awful mildew smell from where a storm flooded us out on Sunday and apparently collapsed half the roof (and yes, we’re still in business and no, this is not the first time our roof has collapsed) but no one bothered to ShopVac up the water. After a fair amount of oohing and aweing over the cute little things and trying to figure out who was going to take them home, another of the night crew came running over saying there was something meowing outside. Kittens in hand, we went to investigate and, sure enough, in the weeds, some poor little thing was crying its frightened head off.
Off go me and a few other workers into the weeds to chase the kitten, who instinctually starts bolting all over the place upon hearing things much larger and scarier sounding than it was, tromping towards it. Tramping through the woods in a dress and heels is not a good idea by any means, and I have no idea why in the hell I decided to dress up for work today, but thankfully I did no serious damage and we managed to catch the kitten, another little, black one who turned out to be the runt of the litter judging from the looks of him.
We’d no sooner found that little guy and gotten him calmed down on the smoke dock (our company’s version of the watercooler), when we heard a fourth set of plaintive mews. Back into the field of weeds went we, but the final kitty eluded us all. This little guy was smarter than his brothers and sister, though. Instead of running for it, he simply curled up somewhere and refused to budge or move. No one had flashlights, so someone got the brilliant idea to fire up their Jeep, turn on the bright lights and drive it out into the middle of the field to try to spotlight this cat, which had to be terrified out of its mind by that point in time. By this point, at least ten of the 35 or so people staffed for the night had joined in the hunt, and about three or four more were looking after the trio of hyperactive kittens we’d already found.
Sadly, I must leave the story by telling you that I don’t know if anyone ever found the fourth kitten, as my shift ended and I was ordered to give up the search and go home. I’ll keep you updated with what I learn when I come in later today. When I did leave, you'll be happy to know, all three of the found kittens already had homes, and there was a waiting list of potential owners, should the fourth cat be found. Sadly, I did not get to take one home, as I already have two spoiled cats and a dog that would have a nervous breakdown if a new animal moved in. Not to mention a grandfather who would shoot me if I brougth home another stray.
And, one of these days, I promise to write a post about actually working at my place of employment, as it seems that all work-related postings have to do with the interesting ways in which I manage to avoid work.
